Dear Sisters Around Me,
I caught myself slipping lately, mentally, which started affecting the way I viewed and felt about certain things in my life. I was doubting myself, lost my confidence, and made excuses on why I didn't deserve the things I wanted. I focused on everything I haven't done and neglected everything that brought me to this place. Essentially, I forgot where I came from and what my journey looked like getting here.
How could I have done that? How could I have let myself become so negative about the person I was and accept to think that no one liked me? Why would I ever think these thoughts were okay? They are far from okay because 1) God's words don't claim that as truth and 2) my journey denies it. I have come a long way and I refuse to let anything let me feel less than qualified.
Early on, I decided that I would not be ordinary, but I would work to become extraordinary. Back in high school, my family was proud of who I pushed myself to become. I challenged myself academically, stayed involved in developing my talents, was recognized for my excellence and adored for my spirit. I focused on what mattered, developing relationships that would prosper and building a future that would last. I started the first Black History Month event at my high school, danced in almost every production offered, and was nominated to represent my school for a city Pathfinder Award in English. I also was elected to be Student Ambassador Chair on campus and joined 2 honor societies. I was on the Principal's List every year since ninth grade and earned achievement awards in five subjects and then graduated high school with a 4.1 GPA and had passed 5 AP and 8 honor classes. I didn't want to be average, I wanted to be more.
Thus, Spelman College, the #1 HBCU, was my choice. Not only did it fit what I was looking for, but I knew I was supposed to be there. My first semester I almost hit a 4.0 to set the tone of the rest of my college academics. I joined Stroll and Step teams and later continued other avenues of dance and performance. I put in work to accomplish my goals. I went out for Miss Alpha Lamda Delta and got second attendent but went out for Miss Kappa Alpha Psi and became queen. With my earned title, I held two campus events, one for Black History Month, in which I addressed issues within the Black community. I had my attendees of this event write positive messages on brown paper bags to symbolize turning something negative into something positive. I had the chance to display these bags on the board in Upper Manley for about a month after. I felt confidence in what I was trying to do.
At the end of my sophomore year, I wanted to help first years transition into Spelman by creating a book filled with quotes of advice and encouragement. I called it "From Spelmanites to You" and got over 75 Spelman students to participate in its creation. I was able to write about it in the Spelman newspaper last year and am still in the process of seeing my dream become reality. I care about adding to Spelman just like I care about my Haitian roots. My junior year, I started the first unofficial Haitian club called Klub Kreyol after the earthquake to help my Haitian Spelman sisters have a place to connect. Outside of Spelman, I will continue to serve my people as a volunteer through the medical mission trips to Haiti I do almost every summer.
But aside for a story of what I've done, I can honestly say I think I am a good person. I genuinely care about people. I truly want to see others people happy and successful. I want people to be inspired by my words and my walk. I want to be able to help others reach their goals. I want to be a good friend, sister, and daughter. I want to bring sunshine to your life. I want be able to share God's blessings in my life. Yet, I get caught up in the little things and forget what I'm about to really be a motivating spirit to others. I've struggled with confidence and let things make me feel inferior.
This by all means, it not a way to say why I'm the best; it's a reminder why I should love myself, never underestimate myself, continue to praise God. It's also an attempt to share that if you were feeling like me, you need to go ahead and write about yourself too. I can be shy, so I won't share my dreams with others and build the support I need. But I'm learning to be more effective and expressive; this was just my first step.
Love,
Stephanie
If you enjoyed this passage, please click the highlighted links throughout the work to learn about my business to read more, click on the Empower Network page to watch my personal video, orclick here!
If you enjoyed this passage, please click the highlighted links throughout the work to learn about my business to read more, click on the Empower Network page to watch my personal video, orclick here!
